Suddenly Sexy

All of a sudden Cam is looking tauntingly sexy. Is it his new overgrown Robert Pattinson hair-do? Possibly it’s his recent love affair with plaid? No, he’s definitely more frequently been hitting the gym. That must be it. Or is it? This familiar phenomenon is so commonly misdiagnosed it amazes me. Time and again guys seem to become “suddenly sexier” without any known cause, and girls obliviously flock to their flirtatious delight. What is this magic love spell these guys have secretly acquired? Ironically, this secret babe magnet is the sudden existence of a girlfriend. 

There’s something so sexy about a guy who has a girlfriend, and that something is a tale as old as time: you want what you can’t have. That guy in your Psych class that sits next to you every Tuesday and Thursday immediately becomes interesting when he mentions that he was in Toronto over the weekend visiting his girlfriend. 

So what is it about guys with girlfriends? Why are girls so attracted to property that’s off the market? 

A guy with a girlfriend can be explained like real estate. It’s like the difference between a house without a pool and a house with a pool, or a beautiful house in a miserable neighbourhood or a quality home in a gated community. The value increases. There must be something valuable about him that enabled him to get a girl to want to have sex with him on a regular basis and publicly flaunt her affection for him. Before he was just an empty lot of land, but now he’s a mansion in downtown Oakville. “If another girl wants to have sex with him, there must be something special about him (aka I should want to have sex with him too)”.

Further, girls are all about competition. Every day we spend too much time picking out cute outfits and perfecting our freshly cut bangs just so that we look better than the next girl. Finding out your friendly classmate has a girlfriend is like an invitation to a boxing match: “well, I bet I’m better than her”. And so begins the sudden infatuation and trivial desire to win over his affection. 

Lastly, like mentioned above, it’s human nature to want what you can’t have. That’s why limited merchandise is so appealing. Once it’s gone, it’s gone forever. You never once visited that corner boutique until you heard it was closing next week. We’re a species that loves taking things for granted that are seemingly abundant and eternal, and treasuring anything that is at all a rarity. 

Now I’m not promoting home-wrecking in the least. Just trying to provide some insight into why your best guy friend, that you never thought twice about, keeps appearing naked in your daydreams. 

So next time you’re crushing hard, make sure it’s a quality home and not just a shack with a pool.

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The Cheating Debate

Cheating. Such a simple word, yet, such a powerful meaning. What is ‘cheating’? What does it mean ‘to cheat’? A seemingly straightforward question  surprisingly isn’t very easy to answer. Nowadays everyone has a different idea of what categorizes ‘cheating’. Some go as far to believe that flirting is classified as cheating while others maintain that it’s not cheating if I didn’t initiate it. With such diverse definitions of the seemingly simple word ‘cheating’ it’s no wonder that university students have a hard time agreeing on boundaries in relationships.

The question proposed is the following: is a girl considered cheating on her boyfriend if she makes out with a girl friend?

The taboo  “girl-on-girl party make-outs” that many university females can relate to in their young rebellious and unwise high school careers has become so common-place that calling it cheating seems absurd to most. 

Not all however. The worst fight that a friend of mine ever had with her boyfriend was about this very subject. She had made out with her roommate and he flew off the handle calling her a cheater. I thought this was the silliest thing I’d ever heard! Of course it wasn’t cheating, it’s not like she had a crush on her roommate, it’s just something that drunk girls do from time to time I thought. Is this the case though? I recently heard of a friend’s ex/current/lingering boyfriend hooking up with his guy friend and she lost her sh*t.

So, what’s the deal with same-sex hook-ups when you’re in a relationship? Is it cheating? Does a double-standard exist between men and women that make it acceptable for girls to make out with their roommates at parties but offside for guys to? 

Apparently cheating isn’t as simple a concept as once thought. Next time you’re thinking about making out with your girl friend think long and hard about whether your boyfriend will be mad. You’ll most likely be way too drunk to think long and hard though so at least make sure there’s no cameras around or you may end up on a site like this the next morning.

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The Infamous LDR

If you are a university student then you most definitely have either been in an LDR (long-distance relationship) or you have friends that have been in an LDR. That being said, more likely than not, you have dedicated way too much of your life to discussing the complex and exhausting issues that encompass an LDR: tears, cheating, cyber-sex, phenomenal phone bills, fights, long-awaited passionate sex, etc.

I have listened to an unfathomable number of stories and been involved in numerous discussions about issues regarding  LDR’s that sometimes I often wonder why any of us would put ourselves through it. Most people don’t believe long distance relationships can ever work. They think the only way an LDR will work is if either you visit your significant other every weekend and don’t have a life of your own or you’re in an open relationship (whether both parties are aware). The possibility of going weeks on end without having sex while you’re in a relationship seems ludicrous to most. 

So why is it, if LDR’s are nothing but a head ache, that so many people fall victim to them?

Most people that have never been in a LDR really don’t understand their value. I don’t blame them really. After analyzing the issue at hand, however, I think the idea of an LDR is a sexy one. 

Being in a committed relationship is a learning experience and most people will say that it causes them to grow up and mature. Moving away to university alone is also a learning experience that most definitely forces you to grow the f*** up and become independent (whether you’re ready to or not). So why not have both? Being in an LDR allows young people to grow individually as a person while still maturing in a committed relationship with someone they love. 

All of my friends that live in the same city  or attend the same university as their boyfriend or girlfriend have a lot of trouble maintaining independence. As George proclaims in Seinfeld, “Worlds are colliding Jerry!”. Your school life, home life, social life, and sex life all become intertwined making it almost impossible to have your own life.

An LDR provides the best of both worlds. You get to have your own social life and independent school experience while maintaining a secure romantic relationship.

“But I could never go that long without having sex!” you may think. Though a terrifying thought, while you’re thinking that, young long-term couples everywhere are complaining about how boring their sex life has become. You know which couples I’m talking about. The couples that have been together forever and are with each other 24/7. They inevitably turn into an old married couple in which passion has unforgivably escaped their bedroom. An LDR forces you to become creative. With endless modes of communication available to the young people of today it’s not hard to think of new ways to keep you and your partner satisfied.

While obviously LDR’s are not for everyone, and are I believe unquestionably not for every age, I think that they can provide a healthy balance in a young university student’s life. University is a time when you should be thinking about your role in the world and building your own independent social, personal, and professional life. An LDR can allow you to pursue that journey while not leaving your high school sweetheart in the dust.

So contrary to popular belief, in terms of the average university student, there is something quite sexy about an LDR.

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